Reefer Madness

This article would have been finished sooner, but I got high. At the very least, thanks to the newly passed Proposition 2 law, Boston has managed to make this a relatively reasonable excuse (although it's always a valid excuse in my world). It gives new meaning to the phrase, as Brian Griffin puts it about the 1960s, "we've lost the values, but we kept the weed."

In my home state of the Bible Belt, conservative politics, pick-up trucks and anti-abortion protests, carrying a pipe could send you to jail for the night. Now I can wholeheartedly thank Massachusetts for becoming the 12th state to decriminalize marijuana: less than one ounce gets you a $100 fine instead of a night avoiding anal rape. Thank you, stoners, for getting off your asses in November long enough to vote. The new law (along with my newfound ability to find weed on Boston's craigslist) gives me faith in you as the nation's rumored #1 stoner city.

Seek out some stoners, break out the papers, attend a celebration event and load up the bong, because after all, and now officially, it's always 4:20 somewhere.

Stoner Ettiquete 101: 10 Rules to get you started on your degree in THC

1. Always share. Even if you have only a small amount of weed. It's the stoner way.

2. Be prepared. Take a couple of minutes to break up your buds by hand or in a grinder before you pack them or roll them up.

3. Pass to the left. It's the Indian way, dude.

4. Offer to a friend first. You don't have to do this every time, but it's a nice gesture and will always make that person feel special.

5. Puff, puff, pass is OK. puff, puff, puff pass? Not cool. Don't Bogart that joint, my friend. Keep it moving.

6. If you don't have weed of your own, ask politely. You're tapped out and find yourself with tokers who don't know you're dry. Ask if you can have a hit and wait patiently until it comes around to you. Don't jump into the stoner circle uninvited.

7. Don't scorch the bowl. When smoking out of a pipe or bong, make sure to light a corner of the bowl and to leave a little green stuff for the next stoner.

8. Watch the spit. Let's all keep our saliva to ourselves. No need to swap spit if you're not dating the guy or girl you're smoking with, right? A common (and much appreciated) technique: Use your fingers (or a fist, chillum-style) as a barrier between your lips and the bowl or joint.

9.Keep it clean. Clean out your paraphernalia often. Replace the bong water after several uses, give your glass a good pipe cleaning occasionally and, if you prefer joints or blunts, wash your hands.

10. Don't pocket someone else's lighter. Stoners love to (inadvertently) steal other people's lighters. No matter how high you are, try to keep track of whose lighter is whose.

- Desi Johnson